Today I feel more alive than I've ever felt in the past 21 years of my life. I feel like I could take on the world and then some. It's such a powerful feeling, not feeling worthless anymore after all this time of feeling so empty and like life was pointless. Old songs have new meaning to me; the games I used to play well I play even better. The second I had played Bejeweled Twist for a full hour and was able to give it my full attention the whole time, I knew this was a new chapter in my life. I knew I had the power to change the world once again. No longer am I restricted to sitting in my apartment all day while I drown in self loathing. I actually feel like going outside right now, and were it not for the fact that in about 15 minutes my friend will be coming over to get me and wait for my check to come, I would. Not to mention the fact that it's raining. But I don't feel powerless or helpless or especially anywhere near overwhelmed right now. If I'm overwhelmed by anything, it's extreme happiness for my newfound inner peace.
So what allowed me to become like this? Believe it or not, I found my "miracle med". Turns out I haven't been depressed so much as anxious. So one night my mother decided to give me a Clonazepam and an Efixir, and within about 10 minutes, I actually felt like doing something.
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